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Writer's pictureReuven Levitt

Internal Family Systems (IFS) : Power tools for self esteem

I want to talk about Internal Family Systems (IFS) and how this therapeutic approach can help children thrive. IFS is a way of understanding the different parts of ourselves, and how they interact with one another. By using IFS with children, you can help them identify and regulate their emotions, build self-esteem, and develop a strong sense of self.

Here are some tips on how to use IFS to help children thrive:

  1. Identify and name different parts

The first step in using IFS with children is to help them identify and name their different parts. For example, a child may have a part that feels scared, a part that feels angry, and a part that feels happy. By helping your child identify and name these parts, you can help them understand and manage their emotions more effectively.

  1. Get to know each part

Once you’ve identified different parts, it’s important to get to know each one. Ask your child to describe how each part feels, what it wants, and how it behaves. This can help your child develop self-awareness and empathy towards their own emotional experiences.

  1. Teach self-compassion

One of the key principles of IFS is self-compassion. Help your child understand that all their parts, even the ones that feel uncomfortable or difficult, are trying to protect them in some way. Encourage your child to treat each part with kindness and compassion, just as they would a friend.

  1. Build a strong sense of self

Using IFS with children can also help them develop a strong sense of self. By understanding and managing their different parts, children can develop a deeper understanding of who they are and what they value. This can lead to a stronger sense of self-esteem and confidence.

  1. Use IFS in everyday life

Finally, it’s important to use IFS in everyday life. Encourage your child to check in with their different parts throughout the day and notice how they’re feeling. Help them identify any parts that may be getting in the way of their goals or values, and work with them to find a way to move forward in a healthy and positive way.

In conclusion, using Internal Family Systems with children can be a powerful way to help them understand and manage their emotions, develop self-compassion, and build a strong sense of self. By identifying and naming different parts, getting to know each one, teaching self-compassion, building self-esteem, and using IFS in everyday life, you can help your child thrive and grow into a confident and resilient individual.

Using Internal Family Systems with children can be a powerful way to help them understand and manage their emotions, develop self-compassion, and build a strong sense of self. By identifying and naming different parts, getting to know each one, teaching self-compassion, building self-esteem, and using IFS in everyday life, you can help your child thrive and grow into a confident and resilient individual.

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