As a concerned parent, I highly recommend “The Confidence Code for Girls” by Katty Kay and Claire Shipman. This empowering and informative book is designed to help girls build confidence, overcome self-doubt, and achieve their full potential.
In the introduction, the authors make a powerful statement about the importance of confidence for girls: “Confidence is the key to success in almost every aspect of life, and it is especially important for girls to have confidence in themselves and their abilities.” (Kay & Shipman, 2018, p. 4). The book then goes on to explore the science of confidence, why girls often struggle with it, and how they can develop and maintain it.
One of the key points the authors make is that confidence is not just a feeling or an attitude, but a skill that can be learned and improved. They emphasize the importance of taking risks, making mistakes, and persevering in the face of challenges. “The more girls practice being brave, the better they become at it, and the more their confidence grows.” (Kay & Shipman, 2018, p. 30).
The authors also discuss the “confidence gap” between girls and boys, and how it develops over time. They cite research that shows that “girls’ self-esteem peaks at age nine, and then takes a sharp downward turn” (Kay & Shipman, 2018, p. 20), and that girls are more likely than boys to underestimate their abilities and shy away from challenging themselves.
One of the most powerful sections of the book is the chapter on “The Power of Yet.” The authors explain how adding the word “yet” to the end of a sentence can turn a negative statement into a positive one, and help girls develop a growth mindset. For example, instead of saying “I can’t do math,” a girl can say “I can’t do math yet, but I’m working on it.” This simple shift in language can have a profound impact on a girl’s confidence and motivation.
The book also offers practical strategies for building confidence, such as developing a support network of family and friends, finding role models and mentors, and setting achievable goals. The authors stress the importance of finding activities that girls enjoy and feel confident in, whether it’s sports, music, art, or anything else. “When girls find something they’re good at, they feel good about themselves, and that spills over into other areas of their lives.” (Kay & Shipman, 2018, p. 97).
Throughout the book, the authors emphasize the importance of taking action, rather than waiting for confidence to magically appear. “Confidence is a result, not a cause. It comes after you’ve taken action, not before.” (Kay & Shipman, 2018, p. 65). They encourage girls to step outside of their comfort zones, try new things, and embrace failure as a learning opportunity.
The book also addresses the impact of social media on girls’ confidence and self-esteem, and offers practical tips for managing the online world. The authors emphasize the importance of limiting screen time, cultivating a healthy body image, and being mindful of the impact of social media on mental health.
In the final section of the book, the authors provide a “Confidence Code” for girls, which includes seven key principles for building and maintaining confidence. These principles include taking risks, owning your strengths, and learning from failure. The authors also emphasize the importance of authenticity and self-awareness, and encourage girls to embrace their unique qualities and strengths.
Overall, “The Confidence Code for Girls” is an inspiring and informative book that offers practical strategies and insights for helping girls build confidence and achieve their full potential. The authors use a warm, friendly tone that will resonate with parents and girls alike, and the book is filled with powerful quotes, helpful exercises, and real-life examples that bring the concepts to life.
If you’re a parent or mentor of a girl, I highly recommend picking up a copy of this book. It’s a valuable resource for helping girls develop the confidence they need to succeed in school, in their careers, and in life. As the authors themselves put it: “We want every girl to believe in herself, to know that she has what it takes to pursue her dreams, and to have the confidence to go after them with passion and purpose.” (Kay & Shipman, 2018, p. 2)
“The Confidence Code for Girls” that I believe capture the spirit of the book:
“When we doubt ourselves, we hold ourselves back. But when we believe in ourselves, we open up a world of possibility.” (Kay & Shipman, 2018, p. 12)
“Confidence is like a muscle that needs to be exercised. The more girls exercise it, the stronger it gets.” (Kay & Shipman, 2018, p. 28)
“It’s not that confident people never feel fear, doubt, or uncertainty. It’s that they have learned to manage those feelings and take action anyway.” (Kay & Shipman, 2018, p. 49)
“Girls are capable of achieving great things, but sometimes they need a little push to believe in themselves.” (Kay & Shipman, 2018, p. 85)
“When girls know they can be successful, they’re more likely to take risks and embrace new challenges. And when they’re not afraid to fail, they’re more likely to achieve their goals.” (Kay & Shipman, 2018, p. 93)
“The more girls see women in leadership roles, the more they’ll believe they can be leaders too. Role models matter.” (Kay & Shipman, 2018, p. 130)
“Confidence is a habit that can be developed over time. By taking small steps every day, girls can build their confidence and achieve their goals.” (Kay & Shipman, 2018, p. 176)
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